For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, as also Christ does the church.
Truth to Learn
Men are responsible for providing for the nourishment and comfort of their wives.
Behind the Words
The word translated “hated” is misesō, which means “to hate, to detest, or to abhor.” It is used frequently in the New Testament to indicate the opposite of agape love.
Sarx is the Greek word translated “flesh.” This word refers to the flesh of a living creature. It is a reference here to the physical part of our existence.
“Nourishes” is translated from extrephō, which is made up of ek, meaning “out of” but used here as an intensifier and trephō, meaning “to nourish, to feed, or to bring up to maturity (as is done to children).” This is probably a reference to providing the needs of the body that allows the body to grow physically.
“Cherishes” is from the Greek verb thalpō, meaning “to make warm.” It is used figuratively to mean “to foster with tender care.” This is probably a reference to comfort and security that a person needs to develop psychologically.
Meaning Explained
Since verse twenty-two in this chapter, Paul has been teaching about the relationship between a man and a woman within a marriage. First, he said, the wife is to “under-rank” herself. She is to voluntarily place herself under the authority of her husband. This action is clearly easier to do when her husband is treating her in the proper manner. However, it is not a conditional “suggestion,” but an unconditional command given by the Apostle. Paul confined this instruction for women to just three verses. He then spent the next seven verses telling men how to relate to their wives. Based on the length of the teaching alone, it appears that his teaching to men is even more important than that which he gave to women.
Paul said that a man is to love his wife with a self-sacrificing love, being more concerned for her needs than for his own. He used two examples to show men how they are to love their wives. The first example is the manner in which Christ loves the church, even to the point of sacrificing His own life to provide life for His bride.
The second example is the manner in which we all love our own flesh and blood. This is what he describes in today’s verse. We all provide nourishment for our bodies in order for our bodies to sustain physical life and grow. And, we all provide for physical comfort for our own bodies. Thus, it follows that part of a man’s responsibility to his wife is to provide both comfort and nourishment for her.
In our current twenty-first society it would be easy to twist this teaching and insist that women should stay at home and men should be the breadwinner of the family. That is NOT what Paul is teaching in this passage. His teaching is simply that a man should love his wife and ensure that her physical and comfort needs are taken care of. It was uncommon, but not unheard of, for a woman in the first century to be the breadwinner of the family. There are several examples of women in the church who were successful business women. One of them was Lydia, who had a business selling purple dye and /or purple fabric. My point is that the customs of the twenty-first century are different from those of the first century, but God’s teaching applies to all time.
Application
Men, how do you stack up against Paul’s teaching in these verses? Are you demonstrating the kind of love in action that places the needs for the sustenance and comfort of your wife above your own needs for these things?
In God's service, for His glory,
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